What is "A Good Mom"?

Good day mom's and mom's-to-be!

So what exactly is the perfect mom? Or even at good mom? What is it to be the perfect mom to your child? Is it teaching you're child every letter of the alphabet before the age of 2? Maybe it's keeping a clean house all day everyday? Or maybe even following every single suggestion from that mom group your in? This is such a deep question and it seems like everyone had their own opinions. So I went out and asked a couple girls (mom's, mom's-to-be and women who aren't mothers) what their definition of "A Good Mom" was. And here were some of the answers(:

"I thinks a good mom is someone who tries their best for their child/children"

"A good mom gets up every morning and during late at night no matter what time is is , and tends to her babies. a good mom is a person that loves their children unconditionally no matter what and will do anything for them"

"I think a good mom is someone who works her ass off to make her children happy. I think its someone who cares and puts her children’s needs & wants before her own. We all have our ways to raise our children but i truly do believe a good mom is one who is there for her children no matter what & supports them through whatever will happen."

"To me a good mom is always there for their kids mentally, spiritually and physically. Always there when you need them day or night."

"Well personally to me a good mom is someone who loves their kids. Someone who plays with them helps them grow and learn. Teaches them right from wrong, how to read and write. A good mom is someone who puts their kids first and does what’s best for their kids. Most of all a good mom is someone who cares no matter what happens."

"Loving your child unconditionally and being present !! A good mom to me, gives her all& does her best!!"

"i think a good mom is a mom that participates. She's there for her kids, not just to take care of them but also to talk with them and acknowledge their feelings. A good mom would also love her children unconditionally, no matter how different they grow up to be. A good mom doesn't have to be rich, with the cleanest house or anything like that, she just needs to make her children feel loved and accepted no matter what"

Do you see a reoccurring pattern?

Tries their best

Loves

Cares

Supports

Present

Participates

Puts their children first

As long as you are TRYING YOUR BEST, YOU'RE A GOOD MOM!

As long as you are LOVING your child YOU'RE A GOOD MOM!

As long as you are CARING for your child YOU'RE A GOOD MOM!

As long as you are SUPPORTING your child YOU'RE A GOOD MOM!

As long as you are PRESENT and PARTICIPATING in your child's life YOU'RE A GOOD MOM!

As long as you are PUTTING YOUR CHILD FIRST, YOU'RE A GOOD MOM!

These were all such amazing and heart filled answers but there's two answers that really caught my eye. These 2 woman who aren't yet mothers explained something that people don't talk much about.

The first one is;

"There is no such thing as a perfect mother no matter how hard you try. Parents will make mistakes just like children do, but we learn from it. What makes a great mother is providing for her children in a way that will help them grow and develop what they will need to succeed in life."

> As mothers we seem to feel like there's so many expectations that we have to achieve, goals that we have to reach. But what's wrong with this is that all these so called "goals" are set by society, what others think you should and shouldn't be doing. We tend to forget that IT'S OKAY to make mistakes, it's okay to make the wrong decision from time to time. We aren't robots, we aren't programmed with the exact details on how to take care of a child the "right" way. And children sure as hell don't come with an instruction manual. We are all out there just trying to do our best. And that's all that counts! As long as you're doing what you feel is right in your heart, than you're right on track!

The second answer was a bit different but still such an amazing point;

"You know what bothers me though? Is the fact that we live in a society where a good mom is often seen as the mom who looks hot! A milf. We associate looks often into our opinions & it sets unrealistic expectations out of people, specially moms. Everyone praises the young & hot moms that constantly look good and have their shit together (from photos & social media) and we forget to praise those who look tired, who gained that weight, who went through the postpartum.."

THIS! THIS MOMMAS! THIS IS SUCH A REAL ISSUE! There's WAY to many people shaming moms for not loosing the baby weight, needing a break, not getting dressed and doing their makeup everyday and the worst one of all, mommas going through postpartum depression and just needing support. And the hard truth about it is that most of the people judging are other moms. Have you ever been part of a mom group? Mom shaming left and right based on every single decision You make about your child. You DO NOT need to impress anyone! Your sweet, loving and caring little baby DOES NOT care if you have an extra few pounds on you. They DO NOT CARE if you're in your PJs with your hair up. They DO NOT care if you haven't showered in 3 days. They love you for YOU. They just want to snuggle up next to you and feel your warmth, they just want you to hold them and make them feel safe. They don't judge. Don't let anyone else's judgments make you feel like any less of a mom! As long as you are doing the best you can than you're a good mom! As long as your baby's needs are met and they are safe you are a good mom!

From one mom to another.

Just-A-Mom